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THE JOURNEY
of how far we came, in words of mine.

It was all in His plans for me to study in Sydney. Now that I'm here, it's up to me to shine His light.

FLIGHT 818 .




unspoken .





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FLY AWAY TO SYD
on the journey to Sydney.

4 years in Sydney is an awefully long time.
Catch me before I fly away, cause I'm having the time of my life.
Friends come and go, but the close ones never part irregardless of the distance.


Wednesday, May 27, 2009
04:01

I'm alive cause Jesus lives in me.
I'm not longer broken because He loves me.
I'm forgiven because He took my place on the cross.
His Grace is more than sufficient for me.


Sunday, May 24, 2009
01:56

Things to say, but i'm unable to express it in words.


Thursday, May 21, 2009
22:19

This semester is all about stability and achieving a balance.

Sadly, I have yet to do so, nor did I strike a balancing between life.
Church, studies, ssa, friends, family and problems...
I have not faced up to any of them.
I have been irresponsible to all.
But I do not even know where I have gone wrong.

Was I wrong to ignore the problems and treat them as if they were non-existent?
Was I wrong to put my family ahead of me, and endure it all?
Was I wrong to put Church ahead of all else?

Like a lost sheep, I have yet to find my way home this semester.
Question is, what do I really want to achieve?


Saturday, May 16, 2009
02:50

It seemed as though not so long ago (more than a year), I prayed to You to soften my heart and let me feel. Looking back, my heart ached several times during this journey but never a breakthrough. Just when I've forgotten about it, something hurt so bad that it broke my heart. And I cried for the first time.

If this is a breakthrough, then why pain? Where is the joyous component of in it?

Instead of running away from You, I gave myself completely. I got involved in church regularly, I attended Connect Group without fail every fortnight. Perhaps the only glitch is that I skipped Sunday service when I was really tired or busy. Yet, why does it seem as though I'm drifting away? After that one time, it feels as though my life has numbed up yet again.

Sleepless nights are my indication of reality, that I've yet to recover from it all.

I'm running aimlessly, distracted constantly, albeit by my 21st.
Only that I know my situation better.

Oh sleepless nights, will you stay away from me?


Monday, May 04, 2009
22:10

And I just feel like giving up.
When that happens, you to question.
"What's the point in all this?"

And I response,
"I don't know. Somehow, it never feels as though I'm doing something for myself."

So then,
How do you find yourself within that?

-

I'm tired.
I really am.